Medical words you might mis-interpret :-)

There are nummerous jargons but the medics are champions in using Latin words which many a patient might not understand or mis-interpret. Try this... :)

Artery - The study of paintings.

Barium - What Doctors do when patients die.
Caesarean Section - A neighbourhood in Rome
Cauterize - Made eye contact with her.
Colic - A sheep dog.
D&C - Where Washington is.
Dilate - To live long.
Enema - Not a friend.
Fibula - A small lie.
Genital - Not a Jew.
Impotent - Distinguished, well known.
Labour Pain - Getting hurt at work.
Morbid - A higher offer.
Nitrates - Cheaper than day rates.
Node - Was aware of...
Outpatient - A person who has fainted.
Post-Operative - Letter carrier.
Recovery Room - Place to do upholstery.
Seizure - Roman Emperor.
Tablet - Small table.
Terminal Illness - Getting sick at the airport.
Urine - Opposite of 'you're out'.

Follow the instructions

Patient:
It's been one month since my last visit and I still feel miserable.

Doctor:
Did you follow the instructions on the medicine I gave you?

Patient:
I sure did - the bottle said 'keep tightly closed.'

The Specialist

'What kind of work do you do?'
 a woman passenger enquired of the man travelling in her train compartment.

'I'm a Naval surgeon,'
he replies.

'My word!'
spluttered the woman,
'How you doctors specialise these days.'

Quick Diagnosis

Nurse:

'Doctor, Doctor the man you've just treated collapsed on the front step. What should I do?'

Doctor:
'Turn him around so it looks like he was just arriving!'

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Thomas Berge in concert ( Heineken Music Hall, Amsterdam) and a lot more..

Exactly two years ago today !!!! Chiel Ottink's splendid performance in the Heineken Hall. (2008)
A tribute to this shining and rising star. The concert in two parts and some other nr 1 hits...

Part 1. (Heineken Hall)

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Part 2

Medley: R. Williams

 Kon ik maar even bij je zijn

.1000 sterren

.Krijg toch allemaal...

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Ieder moment

Wesley Klein : Raise me up
Freek Bartels: The search for Joseph,Simon Bowman: miss Saigon: Why God...,Queen concert and: Too much love will kill you,
Andre Rieu in concert Australia,
Nick & Simon,Danny de Munk / Dave Dekker

Tribute to Michael Jackson ,

Churchgoers aren't always christians...

Priest distinguises himself as a tramp to teach churchgoers a lesson

When Reverend Rigby wanted to teach his congregation a lesson about being kind to others he came up with a rather colourful way of demonstrating his point.

As the 70 churchgoers turned up for their regular Sunday morning service at the Methodist church in Prestatyn, north Wales they found a scruffy tramp sitting in the church porch.
Stinking of beer and dressed in filthy clothes, the disgusted churchgoers did their best to ignore him as they filed past.
This task was made even harder when the unwanted guest joined them on the pews, surrounded with syringes and drinking from a can of lager.
Rev Derek Rigby dressed as a tramp to teach his congregation a lesson before revealing his true identity.

They were therefore astounded - and perhaps more than a little embarrassed - when the ‘tramp’ threw off his scruffy clothes, removed his wig and revealed himself as their minister, Rev Rigby.

Rev Rigby pulled the stunt to remind the congregation about a passage in the Bible when Jesus’ disciples failing to recognise him because of the way he was dressed.
Rev Rigby said: ‘I went to great lengths to be as convincing as possible.
‘I didn’t shave for three days, made my hands and face dirty and drew on tattoos.
I’ bought some scruffy clothes at a charity shop, ripped the trousers, and put on a straggly wig and thick, broken glasses.
‘I then splashed lager over my clothes so I was stinking. I looked in the mirror before the service and I didn't recognise myself.’
Rev Rigby, who was a police officer for 15 years before being ordained 20 years ago, has tricked congregations in the same way at his previous parishes in London and Newport, South Wales.
He said: ‘I didn’t say a word the whole time because I thought someone would recognise my voice.
‘It was interesting to see the reaction from people - I was totally ignored.
‘It showed that we don’t recognise God at work and in each other.’
He said: "In other places I was given as much as £4.50, a packet of biscuits and a blanket - but in Prestatyn I got nothing.

‘I told the congregation they are a stingy lot.

‘Everyone was amazed and later complimented me on my acting skill, though some said I had made them feel terrible.’
Senior church member John Sproston was one of the first to arrive at the service to see the ‘tramp’ on the doorstep.
He said: ‘I think everyone was a bit worried, but when he came into church I thought “Hallelujah”.
‘We were all aghast when he took off his wig because he was very convincing.’


Now I understand why somebody made this sign:

The nude snowman (woman).

Ah, New Jersey: where good taste goes to die.

A Rahway, NJ family built this rather nice female nude out of snow on their lawn. It’s tasteful, artistic and somewhat accomplished, right? Of course, being New Jersey, neighbors complained about the nudity. And by “neighbors complained” I mean that the police showed up, and forced the family to cover-up the sculpture. Isn’t it good to know that your values are being protected?

I think this is a nice piece of art.

Will this post make it through the NJ censor or will I be accused of publicing porn.. ?

For your info, here's the 'real' Venus.
( hm, compaired with this torso I must admit that the snowbust has more..how you may call it ? OMG. she turns me on...!)

C'mon concervative souls, stap down to earth. Save your protests for the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. Ban the gun, stop racial discrimination. But don't make yourself rediculous and the risee of the rest of the world to protest against a snow ass..

Isn't it sad. No more snow-white nudity.

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